i used to hate going to the doctors and that was primarily for one reason. the dreaded scale. what is it about those scales at the doctors offices that's so intimidating? i think it probably has to do with the fact that a perfect stranger is standing there adjusting the scale to find your dreaded number. suddenly it's as if you're sharing this intimate moment with someone you just met. after all, for some of us our weight is one of our deepest darkest secrets and God forbid someone knows the truth. please tell me i'm not the only one who has had these thoughts?
all that to say, today i had none of those feelings. when the nurse called my name she apologized and said that i would have to get weighed today because i hadn't been there in so long. i told her that was fine and happily jumped up on that scale because i'm proud of where i am today. i was extra excited when it was only a pound different from what my scale at home said before i left. sometimes i swear those digital at-home scales are way off, but mine is actually right on.
so get ready. i'm about to share one of my deepest, darkest secrets with you...
i snuck a peek at my chart to see what i weighed the last time they weighed me there (it was 2008 btw- i'm so bad about going to the doctor). it said 221. yup, that's 221lbs. and when i weighed in on my first day of weight watchers this past january? 224. oh dear jesus, hold me now. did i really just put that out there on the web? i guess so.
today their scale said 184. yeah that's 40 lbs people. no wonder i was so stoked to jump on that scale. my doctor was absolutely thrilled with my weight loss and encouraged me to keep going, which i thoroughly plan on doing! and even though 184 sounds great when compared to 224, i still have more journey ahead of me. i can't wait to bust into the 170s and so on and so on. honestly, i cannot tell you how great it feels to be in control of my body in a positive way. i am changing for the better and it is so much fun! this week i fit into size 10 shorts from the loft. i haven't worn a size 10 since i was 20 and i'm almost 29! at target the other day i snagged a dress off the clearance rack in size medium and IT FIT! who is this girl? seriously? you mean 16s and XLs aren't in my clothing vocabulary anymore? wow. i'm just amazed.
if you would have asked me back in january if i thought i'd feel this good about my body today i don't know what i would have told you. every day i get more comfortable in my skin. every day i am shrinking in size, but growing in confidence. sometimes i get this crazy irrational fear that maybe i haven't actually lost weight. maybe it's in my head. yeah, that's a bunch of nonsense. just look at old pictures, sue. you have done this and you are going to continue to do this.
i browsed through some photos and found a couple full body shots... one from 2008 and one from january of this year. below that you'll see a couple shots taken at the beach last week. i'd say the change is pretty obvious. these are definitely not before and afters because i'm still in the middle of this weight loss journey but i think it's good to stop and reflect on how far i've come and to encourage myself to keep at it. see for yourself.
so the proof is in the pictures i guess. i'm not crazy after all! haha!
thanks for all of your support and encouragement as i keep on trucking through this!