Wednesday, January 20, 2010

message in a cookie

last weekend my family went out to pf changs for dinner in honor of kesh's birthday. at the end of the night we got a pile of fortune cookies and i grabbed one. when i read the little fortune inside i was shocked. you can see by the picture that it says: "you will move to a wonderful new home within the year." when i proceeded to tell my family they all thought that i was joking. then i showed them.

i mentioned later that i should take a photo and put it on my blog and my sister agreed, but then she said i should share the backstory of it. so here it is.

i'm 27 and i live with my parents. while that should be reason enough for that fortune cookie to make me smile, there's more. don't get me wrong, i love my parents and i have saved a lot of money by being there which i appreciate very much, but over the last year i have gotten the 'itch.' i realized that it was time to start looking and venturing out on my own. one of the main reasons it hasn't happened sooner was because i was traveling so much and it didn't make sense to put all that responsibility on myself when i wasn't even around to enjoy it. i've now realized that there are ways to make it work so that's no longer one of my excuses.

my requirement for a house is 1) it must be cheap... haha... i am a missionary afterall. no lavish townhome for me. 2) it must be in the city limits of coatesville. for the last 2 years i have worked in this city and grown to love it, especially the people. for most of you this is no big deal, but around here it's not typically a place people aspire to live. it's a tough place filled with violence, drugs, gangs... everything a city has to offer. but it's also a place where i believe hope resides and it's a place God is calling me to so out of obedience i say- bring it on!

last fall my friend found out about this sheriff sale taking place at a rowhome across the street from her. we went over one night with flashlights (the door was open!) and took a peek. it had the most beautiful original thick molding and hardwood floors under that nasty old carpet. it had potential! the more i looked into sheriff sales though the more worried i got. i realized i didn't have everything together yet to pursue it so i dropped it and said if it was meant to be mine it would show up on the market again. well lo and behold in early december it did! turns out a bank reposessed it and had it listed for $34,000. ummmm can we say cheap? i almost peed my pants when i found out. seriously.

so the next day my parents and my realtor went and did an official (legal) walkthrough. haha! we made an offer and then found out that someone had gotten in before us. so i prayed and prayed and kept on praying for almost 5 days while i waited for news. turns out the bank accepted the other offer before they even saw mine. yeah, devastation doesn't even begin to cut it. i mourned that house for a couple weeks. i mourned what i thought was the death of a dream. i felt like God had failed me and i was angry.

at church fellowship the next week i cried and told everyone how disappointed i was and admitted my anger at God for not giving me what i wanted. i had somehow led myself to believe that God would give me this house as a way to show me how much He loved me. so when it fell through i questioned his love for me. yeah, i know. real mature. anyways, after confessing all those thoughts and feelings and literally weeping over what could have been, i released it. i gave it back to the Lord. i let myself lavish in the love that He has for me (house or no house). i allowed myself to trust Him once again with my dreams and the desires of my heart.

so when i opened that fortune cookie and saw that little message i couldn't help but smile. sure, it could have been chance. but it also could have been a little reassurance from my heavenly father that His timing is perfect and that 2010 is going to be a great year. :)

9 comments:

Katie said...

love it. ;) and love the whole new layout all finished!

Gina said...

what a cool story!!!

Lyr said...

I saw the picture and started to laugh.... wow! hehe! Love you!

Brittany Ann said...

Oh, you are going to find your home! That wasn't the one for you! God knew it! And he's promised you more! So perfect!

Love the new look!

Sarah said...

Wow!!! That's pretty awesome!!!

Bethany said...

HAHA Sue that is so awesome! I didn't know you did a walk through on that house! Keep dreaming big, because God promises to do more than we can even ask or think. Can hardly wait to see the results of your waiting on Him.

Laura and Ryan said...

What a great outlook! I would have been upset too (and I'm currently having my own pity party over here)...but how mature to give back to the Lord and wait for his perfect timing!

Crazy Shenanigans said...

That's a great fortune and I'm sure you're going to find a house soon!

the weldons said...

i love this post! looking forward to seeing the ways God will provide for you...it's pretty cool when God arrainges little things...like a fortune cookie message...to remind us he is still there loving us! i have quite a few areas i need to let go of...i'm taking your post to heart and giving them back and wait for God's timing. thanks for the reminder!